From tears of joy to tears of frustration...

in less than 30 seconds. Argh!!!

So my lovely daughter and I were out shopping on Monday (my day off) and we'd been to a couple of stores and I could tell that Gracie was getting tired and hungry. Never a good sign when errands are involved. Me, being the "mom-of-the-year" candidate that I am, bribes said daughter on my way into Target by telling her that if she'll agree to ride quietly in the shopping cart, that I'll buy her some popcorn and a lemonaide for our trip around the store. My darling daughter agrees happily and so I remove her from the carseat thinking... "gee, this might even work!"

As I carry my 35 lb tired toddler into the store, she unexpectedly puts her head down on my shoulder and says, "are you okay now Mommy?" in reference to my surgery last year. I assure her that, yes, I'm fine and I asked her whether she worries about me. (My response is in direct relation to the amount of guilt I feel over stressing her even the tinest bit!) And she said, "Yes, Mommy. You're my best friend." Okay, that one sentence was enough to nearly drive me to my knees in tears... and I told her just how happy I was to hear her say that. Meanwhile, my mind swirled with the proud and happy thought that I must not be doing as much wrong as a parent as I thought. I felt a justified boost in confidence as a parent. I felt... vindicated! Invincible! Strong!

I felt like crawling under a rug... because not 30 seconds later, my sweet, loving daughter was throwing herself onto the floor at the entrance of Target screaming because she wanted the popcorn but refused to sit in the cart. Meanwhile, hordes of smirking shoppers swarmed around my daughter like roaches parting through a sea of roach spray. All of them giving me knowing glances and some even saying... "looks like it's nap time..."

So, just know that Gracie teaches me something everyday...Always expect the unexpected. Complacency gets you nowhere fast. Smugness will trip you up every time. Humility goes a long way. Parents have very hard jobs. Parents are the luckiest people in the world.

I'm so lucky to have her. This I know with every fiber of my being... this might be the one and only thing I ever know for sure about being a mom.