We have an official preschooler now...

So our beautiful daughter turned three on April 23rd... it's hard to believe it but it's true. She had such a great party and a great time. We had lots of friends and family over to celebrate her big day. Complete with cake, ice cream and a pinata. A good time was had by all. She knew she was going to have to share her toys and stuff in her room and was fine with it (a huge step forward) but was quite disappointed that the boys who came over didn't want to play dress up in her fancy dresses. I had to try to explain that boys often don't like to play dress up and suggested some other activities that she might suggest to them!

We took her for her three year check up with Dr. Leavy and he reports that she's growing normally and looking very healthy so that was good news. She was curiously excited about going to the doctor (and had apparently forgotten the shots she got at 2) and since she didn't get shots this time, I'm hoping that her 4 year check up will go smoothly. She's now got an appt. to see her dentist, Dr. Coyle in two weeks and she's excited about going there too. I've already asked Dr. Coyle to talk to her about binky since I think that she'll be far more willing to give up binky on her own if he says that binky isn't good for her teeth. He assures me that this isn't really true and she's fine if she decides to hang onto it. Since she's done so well with giving up other things from babyhood, I'm not sure why this particular one is so difficult but I'd still much rather have her make the decision than make it for her. We'll see how that goes.

It's been really a rough few months in transition. Miss Frances had decided to close her daycare in early March and we really scrambled looking for replacement care. We knew that this wasn't going to be an easy transition for Gracie and it was really borderline nightmarish. The first trauma was with Frances telling her that she was closing... and then Gracie watching and witnessing all that that meant. Frances, unfortunately, had folks coming to buy toys/furnishings etc while the kids were there and so Gracie had to watch these treasured items go one by one. It was very hard on her. Then, once we finally found a new daycare person, we found out that Gracie couldn't start there on that first week of April because she was taking that week off. Frances, bless her heart, agreed to watch Gracie that week at her and Jeff's house but it was hard because she had no toys and no set up at his place for kids. When she finally did get started at Miss Kellee's the following week, it was really difficult. While I had taken Gracie there a few times prior to starting there, the impact of being left there without me didn't quite take hold until I actually tried to leave. The previous trips there were all about having fun with me there and she didn't quite get the fact that this was going to work the same way that it had with Miss Frances and that I'd be leaving her there. Needless to say, there were lots of tears (mine mostly in the privacy of my car) and she had a terrible first day there and received several time outs. I think that Miss Kellee runs a tighter ship overall and Gracie and she really butted heads. In addition, Miss Frances always had plenty of hugs and kisses to dole out and Miss Kellee seems more hands off.

The change was just enough to make the next several weeks hell for me. I was honestly driven to the point where I bribed Gracie with a sticker if she didn't complain or cry about going to Kellee's house in the morning. I put the stickers in my car and let her take one if she didn't have a total meltdown in the car on the way over. I feel like a horrible mom bribing my daughter to hold back with how she's feeling but it was really a matter of survival at that point. I simply couldn't keep taking her and leaving her in such a state every morning.

She seems to have turned the corner now and seems much happier in Kellee's care. She's getting along with the other girls and I especially notice that she and Abby play together very well and seem very happy to play with one another. This is another big step forward. In the past, she's been mainly happy parallel playing but with Abby, she's actively seeking play *with* her and this is a definite change I'm noticing with other playmates as well. She's fussing much less about going now and while I still cringe over the bribery part, I know that we'll eventually get beyond this.


One thing is clear - she's become very adept at figuring out how to get a "yes" answer. We knew she was really smart and as her speech and vocabulary continue to improve, she's been able to go from demanding her wishes, to (grudgingly) asking for what she wants. Too often though, that meant that her wishes were thwarted - even when she asked nicely. Now she's really thinking through a scenerio and asking in such a way as to get the answer she wants. Case in point... warm cocoa. The scene: kitchen in the early morning as mom is desperately trying to get breakfast on the table and keep one active three year old out of the kitchen while breakfast is being made. In desperation, said mom has a light bulb moment where she asks the child in question to "go sit at the kitchen table and I'll go make you some warm cocoa. But you must stay seated at the table while you drink it. Okay?" Child readily agrees to this rare and unexpected treat and sits happily at the table while breakfast is being made.
Scene two: next day... same kitchen, same mom, same child. Child is writhing on floor, bringing various toys in underfoot and is shooed repeatedly from kitchen vicinity. At some point, child returns to kitchen complaining that "she's cold." Mom tells her to go find her slippers and put them on. Apparently the wrong answer. Dad finds her blanket in the living room and wraps her up in it. Again, the apparent wrong answer but said parents are still clueless as to her real desire. Finally, child in desperation just lays it out there and says... "some warm cocoa would help me get warm."

Ohmigod... my child tried to outwit us!!! Not for the first time, mind you... but never before done so cleverly and underhandedly. Clearly, this does not bode well for our future. We are both dismayed, scared, and, despite ourselves, proud of her cleverness. What next? Stay tuned...